Why Do Men Cheat? 1.0

If you want to enjoy this article, I suggest you read the diary entry of the Cleric titled “When is it cheating?” (http://fromjaytoyou.wordpress.com/2013/10/30/8-when-is-it-cheating/). But if you don’t have that much time on your hands, it’s alright, I will bring you up to speed. In writing this post, I presume that you agree with me that we cannot PROPERLY speak of cheating between couples unless in the confines of marriage. If you don’t agree, it will be hard for you to accept what follows in this article. If you are determined to find a reason to nail me, then be my guest and read along.

I almost got into trouble when I asked a guy this question. But I think the stress was well worth it. I had to do this because it seemed I had almost become a thorn in the flesh of my female folks. So I chose to beam the searchlight on the guys and find out what they feel about women, relationship and marriage, all through the eye of a phenomenon they are very at home with – cheating. I must say I was shocked by what most of the guys had to say about themselves. But before I get crucified, I will like to present the facts I was given.
Let’s do it this way. I shall state the “why” first and then go on to present the reasons the guys gave for the “why”. I must warn that this is only a limited survey. So guys and ladies, feel free to register your reservations at the end of this article or confront your man and see if these are true or false.
WHY MEN CHEAT?
Some guys answered this question straight up: “It is in our nature to cheat.” Some others were a lot more cautious and discrete: “We sometimes want to explore other possibilities to be sure we have made a good choice.” You should note I am using the plural because it is the view of a number of people. A fewer guys mentioned that there is the ever-present temptation to cheat, may be out of greed, insecurity or plain adventure. But what they do with this temptation depends on whether they are conscious of the consequences involved or they have disabused their minds about any repercussions. So in all, most guys believe that they have the innate disposition to cheat; what they do with this disposition is entirely up to them.
We must not fail to add the influence of peer pressure in this regard. If the friends a guy keeps are all about “poking and dumping” girls, you can be sure he is a “HIT-MAN”. If he does not approve of the ways of his peeps, you can be sure he won’t always be around them. A guy gets most of his ideas from his “support group”, his friends. So, ladies, show me your man’s friends and I will tell you who he is.

Other factors that may cause a guy to cheat are only secondary characteristics. What I mean is that if he won’t cheat because of the influence of his peer group, these other factors can trigger off his adventurous spirit.

INSECURITY
If your guy never built up enough emotional stability, that is, he was never able to see himself as having any personal worth or integrity, there is the likelihood that he might cheat on you later on, no matter how good and well-intentioned he seems at the moment. Is he always calling to ask you what you are doing at the moment, where you are? When he asks, is there tension in his voice, does he sound suspicious? Is he often uncomfortable when he sees you with other guys or acts cold when you speak about other guys whether casually, maybe a colleague in the office, in school or at church?
Most guys are veeeerrry uncomfortable when another guy features in your conversation with them. This is not enough reason for him to cheat on you. But it is enough reason for him to entertain the thought that you are probably being unfaithful. It is interesting that in the case of the man, every other lady in his life is “just a friend”. This is true for the most part. But for the lady, to the guy’s mind, another guy can never be “just a friend”. It is either the girl is lying or she is too blind to see that “Mr-Just a friend” is a wolf in sheep’s clothing. That is the male psyche for you. It is only with effective communication between a guy and a lady that such tension-prone area as acquaintances can be resolved.
PREVIOUS ADVENTURES
Whether you take my word for it or not, if your man has been in a casual relationship or two in the past, especially sexually active ones, he is likely to cheat on you in the course of time. It is even worse if he never meant for any of those relationships to be serious. Sexual adventure is like any other addiction. It is never completely cured. It is only controlled. Add up his innate disposition for adventure and adventures he has had in the past, what you will get is a CASSANOVA waiting to be manifested. Sex is like a drug (those who have tasted it will know what I am talking about), you can never have 100% satisfaction. Or else why are all those who brag about having the best sexual experiences still having sex? The more waters a guy has tested, the more eager he is to explore and expand his territory.
A person’s sexual experiences only leads to an insatiable appetite that one woman in a permanent relationship cannot assuage. There is no gainsaying that guys territorial in nature; they want to expand their territories, “conquer” more women so to speak. Sexual intimacy is conquest. If they have friends with such tendencies, be sure they have a good chance of being domineering in that sense. If he is an alcoholic or a steady user of alcohol, you don’t need me to tell you the implication of that… To put it plainly, ask him what he thinks of sex.
TO BE CONTINUED…